Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize
