Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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