I CAN MOONWALK!
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
WAIT YOU’VE NEVER BEEN TO COSTCO???
COSTCO IS MAGICAL
I can’t believe you two made a group text to scream at me about Costco.
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