I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
Randomize
