matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
Randomize
