Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
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