She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
Randomize
