normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
how do you say “i know we haven’t hung out in a month, but i gave myself an amazing orgasm to your picture the other day” without coming on too strong
Randomize
