That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
Randomize