Cold hands, warm shart.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
What's dad's email?
[email protected]
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
Randomize
