after a month anything with tits is on the radar
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
its liver damage thursday
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
