the day after is always just damage control
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
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