ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
Randomize
