There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize
