so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Randomize
