Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
The cop busted in, made the music stop, and goes "GUYS LISTEN UP! DRINK, DO DRUGS, HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX, I DONT GIVE A FUCK, JUST QUIET DOWN!" Best. Cop. Ever.
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
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