Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Randomize
