glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
And then my night got REAL pukey
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
MASS TEXT: Next weekend I will be in town for St. Patty's day. There will be a bonfire and liqour olympics. We will have booze but in order to participate it is byob. Upon arrival everyone will be asked to sign a waiver. I am not responsible for liver failure, death, loss of clothing or memory, bites, scratches, hickies, pregnancies, or any other for of injury you may obtain while participating. There will be ridiculous amounts of green glitter, be prepared to puke it up. ALSO WEAR SOMETHING GREEN OR YOU WILL BE PENALIZED!! AUTOMATIC 5 SHOTS. HAPPY GAMING!!!
Randomize
