we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
where are you?
Hypothermia
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
Update: drank half a bottle of Bourbon and texted three ex's. Waiting for the roommates to go to sleep so I can raid the fridge.
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
Randomize
