party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
So I just walked in on one of our neighbors having sex...on our couch.
WHAT?!
He apologized for staining our couch, then asked if he could make me a drink. Pretty sure he was still inside her while we were talking.
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
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