I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
At least be KIND OF sobering up before you text me, I've told you before I don't speak vodka unless I've been drinking it with you.
PS WHY wasn't I drinking it with you? Dick.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
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