remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
Randomize
