After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
Do you know who changed all my phone contacts into characters from Harry Potter?
He Who Must Not Be Named.
Fuck you.
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
Randomize
