ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
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