carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
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