there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
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