we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
Randomize
