I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
Randomize
