im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
Randomize
