i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
People in love make me want to vomit
Swine flu is the new snow day.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Randomize
