I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
...oh my god that's like anal suicide
I'm aware. I'm writing the eulogy for my colon as we speak.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
Randomize
