she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
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