it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
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