The spoon I was using to ice my hickey just fell out of my purse while i was paying at the liquor store. I look like an alcoholic with a meth problem.
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
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