drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
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