maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
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