I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
Rumble strips road head = magical
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
Randomize
