Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
Randomize