i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
Randomize
