i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
Randomize
