There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
Randomize
