sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
Randomize
