no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
Randomize
