I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
