sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
Randomize
