I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
Randomize
