bring money and cleavage
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
I'm sobbing to NWA
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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