Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
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