i was just outside smoking and i saw a hooker sing "i wish i knew who your daddy was" to her new born baby. someone explain to me why i ever left chicago to go to college...
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
