Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
WHAT THE FUCK JASON, WHY IS THERE A FREE BLOW JOBS BY LISA SIGN IN MY FRONT LAWN WITH MY PHONE NUMBER ON IT?! PEOPLE ARE PULLING INTO MY DRIVEWAY!
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
Randomize
